vote for me

So I have to write an essay on a public policy issue, and I chose hunger because it describes me like 75% of the time. What I found shocked me. Every five seconds a child dies from hunger. I have been sitting here for the last hour regretting the 2 1/2 brownies I ingested. In the last hour 667 children have died. I am so sad. I am halfway debating getting a part time job so that I could hopefully earn enough money to support a Compassion child. Then maybe only 15,999 children would die that day.

So I have decided that my first official act as Queen of the world will be to make all healthy food free. Free vegetables, free fruit, free meat, free whole grains, and free dairy products. The only food that you will have to pay for is top of the pyramid food, like soda, candy, cookies, white bread, etc. If you like this plan, then vote for me to be Queen of the world!

seldom, very seldom does complete truth belong to any human disclosure...

I have just finished reading Emma, by Jane Austen. How I long to return to those days where the activity of each day was based principally on friendly visits! I love how women were valued for their education and seen to better the person they were marrying, while at the same time being subject to their husband. But most of all, I love the relationship between Mr. Knightley and Emma. I love how he entreats her to remember that at all times her actions are influential and he urges her to be the very best woman she can be. I love how she freely speaks her mind to him, but retains manners befitting a lady. I love that they value the compassion in each other and are constantly encouraged by the actions of the other. What a cute couple.

the almost ready

Sometimes i just really hate being in college. I mean I totally love learning. Like really love it. But then I look around me at all that is going on and I want to be able to do something, to help in some way. Let's face it, I can't help financially, we are called poor college students for a reason. The next thing people always ask for is prayer. To be totally honest praying does not feel like doing a whole lot to me. Being asked to pray feels like being asked to sit on the sidelines and watch someone else run the race. Do they not know that I like to run too? (metaphorically speaking, definitely not literally) I have always heard the term prayer warrior without really knowing what it meant. I am hoping that over the course of my lifetime, God will teach me.

training my brain to shut up

So one thing that I absolutely love about Elisabeth Elliot is that whenever she is worried or anxious about anything she just journals a butt load of bible verses. How smart is that? Basically what she is doing is telling God that his words are more important than her worried thoughts. I am desperately trying to learn this technique. If there is anything I have learned this year is that I do not handle stress very well. The minute I start thinking about the object of my worry, my heart begins racing and does not stop until I can begin working on a solution to my worry. While these panic attacks are great for late night study sessions, I am pretty sure that they are bad for my body and for my spiritual life. So I am in the process of training my brain, to spit out all my worrisome thoughts, and treasure all the verses that are useful for training in righteousness.
Here are my current brain shut up verses:
Job 42: 2 I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted.
Hebrews 11: 40 God had planned something better for us...
2 Corinthians 5:2 Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling...
Revelation 21: 3-4 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

the woes of a scatterbrain

in an effort to save money i decided to buy some of my school books off of, but this was negated when i forgot and went to the store and bought the EXACT SAME BOOK at the bookstore. as soon as i realized this, i immediately began searching for my receipt. i had a vivid memory of sitting on my couch, looking at the receipt and thinking i need to put this in a safe place. so i looked in every safe place imaginable, from my wallet to every single trashcan and i could not find it. after an hour of searching, i was wondering if i started crying in the bookstore if they would take pity on me. just as i was about to drive to the bookstore, i look down and on the floor of my car was the receipt i was looking for the entire time.

The weirdest part is I still had that memory of sitting on my couch and looking at the receipt.

It's kind of scary to realize that your thoughts lie to you. And as much as I try to protest, I really can't trust myself. I can't trust myself to distinguish right from wrong or to distinguish reality from illusions.

1 Corinthians 1: 25
the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

new years thoughts

So I didn't start thinking far enough in advance this year to make new years resolutions actually on new years, but I am sure it will still count.

I want to be more consistent in every area of my life.
I want to consistently read and learn the Bible,
I want to finally establish a good sleeping schedule,
I want to exercise and eat healthy not to lose weight, but to take care of my temple and hopefully avoid anymore costly trips to the emergency room,
I want to be a good steward of my money and learn to be content with what I have.
I want to get more involved both at church and on campus.
I want to commit to a craft, too many things in my life are half-finished.
I want to be able to take risks because more often than not I chicken out on applying for things I want because I don't believe I will get it.
I want to develop better relationships with my professors, I have managed to avoid being yelled at thus far so I bet it probably won't happen.
I want to develop a wider variety of friends, I don't want to be narrow minded or limited with my friendships

My psychology professor would say that none of these are good resolutions because they can't be measured, but I did it that way intentionally. I don't want my resolutions to be a rulebook or a recipe for a better me. I just want to be mindful of things that are important to me.