you know how i love/am obsessed with black people?

Well today, I had an epiphany.


I feel like this makes it a little more normal. I love black people and want to be their baby mamas because... I had a black babysitter growing up. I don't know how I never put two and two together before. From the first moment I met Cardia - I walked straight up to her and rubbed her legs and asked her if she was wearing panty hose - I have loved black people. She is the one who told me that I was ashy and needed lotion, and so I think that I have a permanent right to use the word ashy for myself. I have a very vivid memory of getting stung by a wasp and her FREAKING out. I don't even think I was crying but she was in superdrive pulling out the alcohol and calling my mom to make sure that I would live. So funny.

I am debating whether this connection to a black person gives me the right to walk up to a black person and holla at them or start getting on with my ghetto self. I probably won't because I don't want to die. Not because I think they would kill me, but because I think I would die of embarrassment.

Now that I have had this beautiful epiphany, I am determined to make some black friends and become a little more in touch with my heritage. And also I just need to know because when I have me some little chocolate children, I don't want them to be growing up like total cracker babies.

Countdown to turning old.

This is my last night to be a teenager. I will never ever be a teen again. That means I no longer have an excuse to be dramatic or rebellious. Darn. At least I got it all out then...

People in their 20s have to start moving forward with their lives... like getting married and making babies. Talk about pressure! I feel like I am just now learning how to be a college kid (minus the staying up late, drinking, promiscuous activity, wild partying, etc.)

In two hours, I will officially have lived two decades. I experienced the 90s and the millinium. Bring it on 2011!

It doesn't really matter that I am turning 20 though, because people will still ask me if I am 12. And yes I might be thankful about that one day when I am older, but I am not thankful for it right now.

I believe in Jesus... and coffee

It's official. I am an every morning coffee drinker.

As in, when I am running so late that I can't make it or forget my cup or suddenly feel the need to be independent from coffee so I don't drink any, you probably shouldn't talk to me.

There is something magical that happens when I am finishing my cup and suddenly I look up and realize that I am now awake.

I don't know what I was waiting for my whole life. I was probably never even awake until this summer.

Thank you Jesus for coffee. And for the creamer and the sugar that make it actually taste good.


Today, while cooking, I decided that I need to use the word sassafrass more often. I have no idea what it actually means, but I am choosing to use it as a word to express my liking of something.


That's so sassafrass.

Oh sassafrass (term of endearment).

So I was reading the most sassafrassiest blog the other day.

Seriously, how fun is that to say? I am pretty sure it would like MAKE any conversation.