mommy dearest

Here is the reason why (if I ever become a mom) I believe I will be a mom to about 15 children:

Today, I set out to cook a pasta recipe. It said six servings. I said awesome, now I don't have to cook for the rest of the week, I can just eat some healthy, tasty leftovers. So I made the recipes with some minor improvements (adding all of my favorite vegetables and adding turkey pepperoni and some chicken -to keep me from getting all anemic on everything)), little did I know that I was cooking enough for an army. I ate about 1/20th of my concoction and was completely and totally full.

Yesterday, I decided to make banana pudding. Well I made it and it filled up the largest tupperware container we have. I think I have eaten less than 1/6th of it and I have already had two servings!

I am ridiculous. I accidentally cook way more than I need all the time. And that is why I am going to be the mother 0f a billion children.

The reason why I am not fit to be the mother of any children:

I still regularly have nightmares. Ones that scare me so badly that I have to get up and turn on every light and check every nook and cranny for monsters or people wanting to kill me.

I also believe that if any part of my body is sticking out from under the covers then the bad people will know I am there and come kill me.

What kind of mother will I be? My kids will be crying but I will be to scared to get out of bed to come check on them. Or they will come and tell me about their nightmare and I will start crying because it scared me.

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